Neither of these women is me.
Colorado Mommy #1: "Where did you buy passes for the season?"
Me: "I don't ski."
All eyes pop over to me. An air of confusion envelops the group.
Colorado Mommy #2: "Well, where do you like to hike?"
Me (becoming visibly nervous): "I don't hike. But I do walk around the neighborhood sometimes."
The group shifts as a whole and turns towards me.
Colorado Mommy #3: "Do you bike?"
Me (beads of sweat may be forming on my brow): "Uh, no."
Looks of hostility, enmity and possibly pity break out on the women's faces.
Me (my voice rising an octave): "Have you seen the new Kate Spade for West Elm collection? It's so cute!"
The bell rings and children begin to rush out of the school.
Relief washes over all of the mommies.